Three Kids and a…Time We Didn’t Stay (Our Family Travel Warning)
The view as we waited for the gate to be opened was breathtaking. And barren. It was a combination of our first stunned sightings of Mount Etna, its steam puffing into the dusk sky, and the damp dark rolling in over the empty, treeless hills we were perched upon. It was cold excitement, nervous anticipation.
The views off the side of the hill probably seemed so inviting because the one before us, of shuttered gates and dirt roads disappearing around the folds of the hills, was so secretive. In retrospect, we should have known. We should have listened. But we didn’t, and, instead, we followed the man bicycling in torn sweatpants further up the hill after he opened the gates and then locked them behind us.
As a family of five, it can be difficult to find the perfect places to stay when we travel, and our trip to Sicily was no exception. Two hotel rooms can often be expensive and risky since we are never guaranteed connecting rooms. Family suites are just a giant room with a bed and fold out couch, and this momma values her wine time after the littles are asleep so sharing a room is a no go. Airbnbs, in some places, are of slim pickings. So, after tossing a bit of this and a bit of that around, we decided on an agriturismo. And with that decision behind us, our excitement grew.
What is an agriturismo? As evidenced by the name, it is literally the combination of agriculture and tourism: a farmhouse stay. Typically argriturismos are independently owned working-farms where the owners, often the actual farmers of the agriturismo, have decided to partially use their farm for accommodations. Guests usually stay in the main house or in an annex built on the property. And, the best part, usually meals at agriturismos are made from goods harvested from the farm itself, whether it be eggs, meat, milk, olive oil, fruits, vegetables, or anything else you can imagine.
Agriturismos need not be rustic days out on the farm either. We’re not talking pumping your own water from the well and shuffling in the dark to outhouses. In fact, many are considered luxury stays with gorgeous pools and grounds, chefs and modern amenities. There’s wifi and wine, quaintness and countryside, intimacy and expansive spaces. It can be the starting point of a great dream for even the most unimaginative.
So it comes as no surprise then, that we had expectations. And maybe that’s where we made our first mistake. We let ourselves believe the pastoral myth rather than the potential reality. While Three Kids’ Dad can freely admit (now) that he didn’t do as much research on our agriturismo as he should have, honestly, there was no research that could have prepared us for our arrival (or even more so for our departure).
What we did know, though, through our Expedia booking site, was that the agriturismo we were staying at was fairly new, with limited reviews online. It had a buffet breakfast, newspapers in the lobby area, wifi, room service, a pool bar, transportation to and from the airport, and dry cleaning services, among other offerings. We interpreted this to mean that we would have access to food on site, a gathering place (at least for meals and newspapers) where we could get to know other guests or the owners, and a fairly comfortable experience. Oh and agriculture. We absolutely expected some, even a lot, of that.
When the gates locked behind us that day, we climbed even higher up the hill, circling around past a small cinderblock house. Up we went until there was a small, level patch cut into the mountain. It was here that the road opened up into a giant gravel lot, and the man on the bike pointed towards a cabin along the back corner, built between cinderblock retaining wall and pebbled parking lot.
We inched closer and parked behind a collection of building equipment: pipes and tubs, tubes and siding. And beyond a large, covered, circular pond (I’m just guessing at what that was supposed to be) and a high-voltage power line twenty feet from the cabin’s door that had caged dogs underneath it, that was all that was there. Until a few RVs started to pull up and fill in the gravel lot outside our door.
We got out, first Three Kid’s dad followed quickly by three curious and giddy little people. I lingered behind, a pit of what I now recognize as disappointment, welling deep in my core, keeping me from tagging along. The kids rushed back to the car, excited to explain the little cabin’s layout. So, weary from the day, ready to rest and explore, I pushed those feelings down and let my littles lead me forward.
The cabin was quaint. Sure, it had a few dangling wires, but it was complete otherwise. It was furnished simply, but comfortably. So we started to unpack for the night. Except something didn’t feel right. There was nowhere to “check in.” Nowhere for the buffet breakfast. No pool bar. No room service. All of which we could live with, though it rubbed against our expectations. The big issue, what was most important, is there was no farm. There was not a single aspect of agriculture here (benefit of the doubt? Maybe a freshly planted sapling of a fruit tree or two?). It was just a sea of gravel and cinderblocks. And that did not sit well.
But we were locked in. Literally.
We met eyes and knew we couldn’t stay. It was nothing like those sweet expectations we had of being surrounded by lush greenery, fields of growth, animals, gardens, quaintness. It was only gravel and barren land. It was a cold wind, sizzling power-lines and barking watch dogs. It was RVs parked right up to our front door. So we packed back up. And that is when it really began to be a problem.
We had booked our stay through Expedia and had expected to pay through Expedia, but upon arrival were told we needed to pay in cash, an amount we didn’t have on us as we tend to travel light when it comes to cash. No problem, though, our sweatpant-clad host told us; we could go into town, withdraw the cash, and pay him after we found ourselves some dinner. Of course, that was all before he saw us packing the car back up to leave.
He ran over, his arms in the air, screaming. He tried to stop Three Kids’ dad from putting the few overnight bags back in the trunk. And then our host stopped him in the doorway of the cabin as he tried to bring the last of our belongings out still angry. Still yelling. Still throwing his arms around. I quietly rounded up the little people, put them in the car and buckled them in with a smile on my face and a soft song. But they could feel it in the air, popping the way the high voltage wires sizzled above us.
While all the details of the hour-long “exchange” remain a bit of a blur, there is one aspect that stands out the most: our host was not letting us leave until we paid him in full. In cash. The cash we didn’t have. That he wouldn’t let us leave to get. And let me be clear, we didn’t even mind paying for the night in full as a “cancellation” fee, but it had to be done through our credit card on file with Expedia. Because we didn’t have the cash.
The scene finally concluded when Three Kid’s dad slid into the car amidst the protests of our host who had put his body between the road and our way out, screaming that we must stay the night and he would call the police if we left. Three Kids’ dad, who had, finally, trusted his own instincts (something we both should have done so much earlier) and taken the front gate key from on the table, calmly told our host we had it and we were letting ourselves out and leaving the key behind.
As we wound our way down the slender gravel road to the locked gate, a car came screeching up behind us. Out flew our host in a frantic attempt to stop us. And that is when a beautiful RV, another guest for the night, pulled up to the other side of the shuttered gate. Forced to keep his composure, our host snapped himself out of his craze and opened the gate. Seizing the opportunity, Three Kids’ dad quickly maneuvered our car in a position where we had to get out of the gates, squeezing between the RV and the side of the hill, before the RV could in. And that was our great escape.
We drove on that night in the darkness wondering how this all had come to happen. We, wanting to believe the best, hoped (and continue to do so) that much of what happened really was a “lost in translation” type of incident. The agriturismo wasn’t really trying to sell a false narrative of a pastoral beauty that didn’t exist. Our sweatpant-clad host really, naively, didn’t see the problem with forcing a family to stay locked behind a gate until they came up with a certain amount of cash. (But I do still struggle a bit with trying to write it all off.)
The only way I could really make sense of it all that night and even the only way I can make sense of it this night, and probably every night in between and every night after, is to figure out what it is that put us in that situation. If I can’t change it, I want to prevent it. And where we lost our way was when we stopped listening.
It was all there for us: Three Kids’ dad had said he felt like he didn’t do enough research on where we were staying. He said he was uncomfortable when we were on the outside of the locked gates. I couldn’t bring myself to leave the car when we saw the expansive gravel lot. The discomfort had been creeping in. From everywhere. But we let it reside there fully before we acted on it. Maybe next time, we can hear it when it first speaks, listen to it a bit deeper, and manage that fine line between holding ourselves back and just rushing forward.
If you want to hear about what we did right on our trip to Sicily, check out our itinerary here!
78 Comments
Kristie
I’m sorry to hear about your nightmare experience! Glad you were able to get out. Very creepy! I guess it is a good reminder for us readers to do the research before you book.
Three Kids and A Car
Yes. So much research. And thank you!
Pam
Yikes! What an experience. I was nervous for you just reading all about it.
Three Kids and A Car
Oh thanks! We’re all doing fine now!
alison netzer
So sorry about that experience. We , as a family of five, have had some similar. I have learned to book directly with the hotel, agriturismo, apartment as much as possible. Glad you got out. One for the books indeed.
Three Kids and A Car
Great advice! Thanks! And, I’m sorry you’ve had a similar experience.
Laura G
Oh my goodness, what an adventure… But those make memories you’ll talk about and remember for years to come!!
Three Kids and A Car
They certainly are! Thanks!
Janine
What a crazy story! Unfortunately, Sicily – while full of wonderful people – also has a few bad nuggets. I’m glad you guys got out.
Three Kids and A Car
It really was the only bad nugget we found, fortunately. Otherwise, it was a great trip! And thank you!
kat
Oh my gosh! What an experience!!!! Especially with little ones in tow. I’m glad you guys got out and went somewhere more comfortable. Definitely an adventure you’ll never forget.
Three Kids and A Car
Thanks Kat. It was memorable indeed!
Kirstie
Omg! How awful!!!! I have never heard of this type of stay, but I would definitely report back to Expedia!
Three Kids and A Car
We have reported back. I’m not sure that much action has been taken, but at least they’ve been told. Thanks!
Kristi @ Way Beyond The Norm
Wow. That’s just plain crazy. And a little creepy. Always trust your instincts!
Three Kids and A Car
Totally creepy. But lesson learned!
Shirley
Wow! That’s pretty scary! I’m glad you trusted your gut, as I’ve never found it to be wrong.
Three Kids and A Car
Thanks Shirley. I think you’re right.
Tiffany
Holy cow! I was speechless for a bit there. I am just so glad you made it out safe. I look forward to reading about all the GOOD stuff!
Three Kids and A Car
Thanks Tiffany. There’s plenty more good stuff than bad stuff.
Aaron
Wow – what an awful experience! And a BIG lesson learned… listen to your gut (and past guests reviews!). Thank you for sharing and reminding the rest of us how important that is. And now you have one heck of a story to tell!
Three Kids and A Car
Thanks. There really were no reviews for this place. It seemed to have just opened. That’s where I think we went wrong. But, again, lesson learned.
Kendra
OMG that must have been so scary!! Glad it turned out positive. I had never heard of agriturismo and will do research if we’re in a location where it’s an option!!
Three Kids and A Car
Most agriturismos I’ve heard about are wonderful places. Just do your research and you’d find one that fits your needs. And if there isn’t much info on it, maybe pick a different one.
Julie Jennings
I am so sorry this happened to your family. That must have been scary with your young children with you. Thank goodness you are all safe. Enjoy these special years and making memories….
Three Kids and A Car
Thanks so much Julie!
Alicia
I’m so happy you wrote about travel fails! The reality is, we all have them. And that is part of the adventure!!
Three Kids and A Car
Oh Gosh. We have them. Lots of them. Some of them become our favorite parts of traveling. (Only in retrospect though.)
Margie de Quesada
Wow… good instincts in leaving! We just had a similar experience in Montana… we knew we just had to leave and found a polite way out (for our family’s sake).
Three Kids and A Car
Ohhhh…that sounds troubling! I’m glad you managed to safely get out.
Dawn
Thanks so much for sharing your story, although I am sorry to hear what you guys went through. That sounds so terrible to experience, especially with the kids. We had a similarly disappointing experience (although not as scary) in Indonesia where we were supposed to stay at a home and do a workaway (teaching english). Our kids were sick, conditions were way more basic than I expected (the hosts were lovely though) and the thought of staying there for a full week was not good. We made the decision to leave the next morning and I am so glad we did…not worth being uncomfortable for.
Three Kids and A Car
Sometimes you just have to do what is right for you, and especially right for your kids. Sorry to hear of your experience.
Jennifer
Oh my gosh! What an awful experience!! I’m so glad that y’all got out of there safely though!!
Three Kids and A Car
Thank you so much Jennifer!
LORI LEROY
what a harrowing experience! It’s hard to listen to your gut when you’re tired and just want to relax, but you did the right thing. I love the good AirBnBs and homestays, but it can be tough to trust reviews and proprietors, and traveling with kids always makes it more challenging. What I was comfortable dealing with before children was a lot different than traveling with them.
Three Kids and A Car
I totally agree. Our perspective on what we need in terms of lodging (and most things actually) has totally changed with kids too.
Gina
WOW!!!! Glad you made it out safely. Your story shows the importance of making sure you do the research ahead of time.
Three Kids and A Car
Always. And we usually are pretty good at it. I’m not so sure how it slipped through the cracks here. But we’ll be better about it in the future, Im sure.
Lisa
That is pure insanity! I am so glad you made it out safely!
Three Kids and A Car
Thank you Lisa! We are too!
Christina
Wow! What a story. Good thing there was an opening that allowed you to leave. I have never had this experience and hope you don’t have it again, ever. It is so frustrating when descriptions from booking sites don’t match reality but this was definitely an extreme scenario.
Three Kids and A Car
Agree. It’s totally frustrating when it isn’t what you expect. And I’m ok with that bit of frustration, but not necessarily the inability to leave.
Diana Rowe
Wow, what a crazy story! You are right — we should always trust our gut instinct. Did you “report” to Expedia?
Three Kids and A Car
We did report to Expedia. Surprisingly, they were pretty uninterested in hearing about both how the place is advertised wrong and about how they’re promoting a place where the owner feels comfortable keeping people from leaving. In the end, we were able to give our info to someone with a bit more pull in the company and we haven’t heard anything about the situation since…but we haven’t been charged for it either (which we were told we still would be).
Melinda
Crazy story! I’m wondering, how the kids handled the whole experience? And do you regret going? It seems like It was scary and frustrating, but after the fact, it was a great learning experience. You were able to learn this lesson in a way that you all came out safely, although shaken up. I know we’ve had some like that, and others that I really do just regret! Sorry if this comes across insensitive, I’m just curious how other people view these kinds of things.
Three Kids and A Car
The kids seemed to fine with the experience overall, given the circumstances. They’ve just collected it and filed it under another story to tell. And no, I don’t regret it at all. We were able to learn a bit. There are things we just can’t predict or expect. And this is one of them. It certainly won’t change how or where we travel and we’ll be back to stay in an agriturismo (we’ll just research it a bit better!).
Katie
What a scary experience! I’m so glad you were able to get out of there and didn’t decide to spend the night!
Three Kids and A Car
So am I! There was just no way we could spend the night after seeing the host’s anger…
Brittany McCabe
Oh my goodness! Traveling overseas with kids can be scary. I guess you never fully know what type of situation you will find yourself in. When you book something through expedia, you kinda guess it will go well. Guess not. Glad you guys got out of there.
Three Kids and A Car
Fortunately, we’ve never had any other real issues traveling overseas that we didn’t or wouldn’t have had in the US. But I do think we just put our faith in Expedia because we were familiar with it rather than doing our own research.
Dana Ivy
Gahhh! This sounds wild BUT I get it. I’ve been in a few situations where we didn’t stay either. YOLO and you want to make it great!!
Xo Dana Ivy // http://www.iadorewhatilove.com
Three Kids and A Car
Not only was it not what we expected, once we saw how the host acted, we knew we had to leave. At that point it was less about wanting the perfect accommodation and more about wanting to feel safe.
Jennifer Waldon
So scary! Traveling can always be exciting, but I do get more nervous with traveling out of the country. Not sure I would stay at one of these agriculture type places.
Three Kids and A Car
Most of the agroturismos are supposed to be amazing experiences. And to be honest, ours really wasn’t one. In fact, I’m not sure how it was able to call itself that…Anyway, our cousin just came back from what looked like an amazing experience at one. Just choose one that is well established!
Kisha
This story had me on edge like I was there. If you think finding accommodations for five is bad, just imagine my family of 7. I’m glad you guys trusted your gut eventually and left. Accommodations can make or ruin a vacation—I know😩
Three Kids and A Car
Oh I can’t even imagine with 7! And it’s true that accommodations can make or ruin a vacation. Especially when a certain expectation is established.
Laurie
Holy cow! What a crazy experience. I’m sorry you had to go through it but thank you for writing about it so that it might prevent someone else from experiencing it. Hindsight is 20/20!
Three Kids and A Car
Yes, hopefully someone will benefit from our mistake. It’s really about research (but even then, reviews aren’t always to be trusted…).
Stephanie Tollette
Wow, what a story!! I can relate to this as on a family vacation when I was growing up we rented a cabin on a lake and literally it was the WORST place we had ever stayed! It was dirty, full of bugs, so small, and just an awful experience. It’s hard to know sometimes what you’re getting! Thanks for sharing.
Three Kids and A Car
Oh no! I hope you didn’t stay and still had time to find somewhere better suited for your needs. Finding somewhere can always be a bit challenging, but usually it isn’t sooooo crazy.
Ashley Newton
I would have been FREAKING OUT. Good for you for sticking to your gut!
Three Kids and A Car
I think I held it together because of the kids. But then once they were safely in bed for the night…I kind of did freak out!
Candy
This does not sound like a good experience. This is why I avoid staying at places with little to no review. So glad you were able to make it out of there!
Corinne Y Vail
What a nightmare! We’ve had some similar cases like this too. And as you say, we were happy to pay the night stay just to get away. The we blasted away on the reviews, on every outlet. Glad to hear the rest of the trip was samuch better!
Tif
I have heard of farmstays in Iceland but nothing like that in Italy. I am sorry for your experience, sounds kind of scary him running around yelling. I am glad you guys are all safe and out of that situation. Sometimes I am naive and just book places without digging around more- this is a great reminder to always dig a little.
Erica Edwards
Man oh man, what a nightmare! But on the bright side it’s definitely going to make for a hillarious table to tell around the dinner table for years to come 😊 You’d think with all of the different reviewing platforms around nowadays that hosts would get wise to acting out like that!
Jeremy
OMG ! That was one story ! Thanks for sharing, I’ll be sure to keep this in mind if I ever make such considerations. I always make sure I do as much research and read all the reviews. But, I too, had some upsetting experiences, and I can understand it can really ruin the holiday mood. Glad you came out of it safe.
Sandy N Vyjay
What a sour experience. The good thing is you people were able to get away. These experiences invariably happen in spite of all the experience and research. Reading about your experience, we ourselves will exercise a little more caution while booking these kinds of unconventional places.
Maggie
Oh my gosh, that’s terrible!!!! I can’t imagine having a host yell and scream like that! Abd being locked in!! I stayed in an agriturismo in Tuscany and it really was a lovely experience! Sounds like this one was just full of false advertising.
Three Kids and A Car
I honestly have only heard of people having amazing times. This one just didn’t cut it though. But I won’t give up on them. Glad to hear yours worked out.
Lara Dunning
Wow, what a story! He certainly didn’t act like a hotelier, and on top of that, he expected you to pay with cash and not via Expedia. Seems like you would then have been charged double then – with cash and the card. Good reminder to take the time to do extra homework and follow and listen to your instincts.
Three Kids and A Car
I agree. Not what you’d expect from your host for the night. Kind of made it more urgent that we leave.
Emma
Wow that does sound nerve wracking especially with littles! Glad it turned out ok!
Three Kids and A Car
Me too! It was a bit crazy. But I don’t think we quite got how crazy it was until we were an hour or so down the road!
Bex
Woah, I was gripped reading your tale! I can imagine how anxious you felt! I’m glad you got out in the end without it escalating any more!
Three Kids and A Car
Thanks! Me too. It was a bit much, but thankfully the kids don’t seem any worse for the wear!
Donna
I hope you reported that situation to expedia?! Sounds very scary actually.
Three Kids and A Car
Hi Donna-
We did. They weren’t very helpful at first, but it in the end we got the help we needed. I’m hoping that our situation doesn’t happen to anyone else.